Thursday, May 5, 2016

Iran bad-mouths USA and threatens to block Persian Gulf trading lane

The terrorist nation of Iran is threatening to block a vital Persian Gulf access route because of our "meddling approach and tone." They must realize that all we seem to have left in our arsenal is our tone and perhaps a wagging finger.

The Iranian admonition by the Islamic Revolutionary Guards Corps (pronounced "core," Mr. Obama) and by the Foreign Ministry came just days after Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, the supreme leader for life yadda yadda, expressed their testiness with the USA and questioning our longstanding deployment of the Fifth Fleet in the Persian Gulf.

The ayatollah said, "It is Americans who should explain why they have come here from the other side of the world and stage war games."

It's what we do, you stupid terrorist scumcrumpet. Like most world powers and Santa Claus, we are everywhere. But I forgot, if you had your way, you'd behead Santa Claus.

We know Iran hates America. That's why we've been so nice to them regarding the nuclear deal--we don't want to upset them because they might continue the national chant of "Death to America." 

Although we've lifted sanctions on Iran, (which proves that liberals are politically schizophrenic and anti-American) they haven't yet benefitted economically by the lifting. In order to save face, the ayatollah is blaming the United States of obstructing their ability to do business and attract investments, but it's hard to attract foreigners to get involved with a bunch of crazy jihadists, and there remain other US financial restrictions that have nothing to do with the nuclear deal.

Iran thought they'd be rolling in dough by now but miscalculated it.

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