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Sunday, April 24, 2016

Sanders and the fate of the Paw People

"Paw people don't vote," Bernie Sanders complains, and he doesn't mean animals with paws. He's talking people in poverty. He's using that as an excuse to explain why he, a socialist, is losing to the felon, Hillary Clinton.

Bernie was asked on "Meet the Press" Sunday why he consistently loses to the most distrusted, unlikeable, loud-mouthed candidate of all time. 

He said that he wouldn't be trailing the incompetent Clinton by 275 delegates if the delegates themselves were socialists and math challenged, and if "maw paw people would come out and vote" [for him]. 

"I mean, that's just a fact," the socialist said. "That's a sad reality of American society; and that's what we have to transform."

"We have one--as you know--one of the lowest voter turnouts of any major country on Earth. We have done a good job bringing young people in. I think we have done--had some success with lower income people. But in America today--the last election in 2014, 80 percent of poor people did not vote."

And Bernie knows about poor people. Back as a young man living for a while on a commune in Vermont, he lost his job and then his first wife to divorce. Unemployed, a failed carpenter, and overall, a failed hippie, Bernie knew what it meant to be paw.

Eventually, he turned to writing pornography. He (you should forgive the expression) sucked at that too.

If we only give him a chance at the presidency, I am completely confident his record will not be tarnished.