Thursday, October 15, 2015

The Left's Candidates

You may have watch the Democratic "debate" on October 13th, and if you did, I hope you weren't operating heavy machinery at the time.

It absolutely was a high point in Hillary Clinton's low-point career. 

Hillary was handed the presidential nomination by Bernie Sanders when he said that the American people are "sick and tired of hearing about Hillary Clinton's damn emails."

Bernie Sanders does not speak for the American people. That socialist certainly doesn't speak for me and most people who believe that socialism is crappy economics pretending to have a heart.

So let's take a look at the main candidates (aka mannequins) the Democrats have put into the stew. None of them will have a chance in hell of beating her unless she is indicted for her crimes and ends up having to press [blue] dresses in the slammer.

Lincoln Chafee b. March 26, 1953 (age 62) was Governor of Rhode Island from 2011 to 2015 and prior to that was Mayor of Warwick from 1993 to 1999. He's the son of Republic politician John Chafee who was the 66th Governor of Rhode Island, Secretary of the Navy from 1969 to 1972 and held other political positions in government.

Lincoln graduated from Brown University with a degree in Classics, which gives him as much credibility as a liberal arts professor calling in airstrikes on Russian troops in Syria. "Go left . . . go very left . . . go farther left . . . bombs away!" 

Of the many participation trophies Chafee has won, he is most proud of the "Red Skelton Look-alike" trophy that hangs proudly over the headboard of his Colonial canopy bed.

Martin O'Malley b. January 18, 1963 (age 52) is the 61st Governor of Maryland and was also Mayor of Baltimore from 1999 to 2007.  He served as the Chair of the Democratic Governors Association from 2011 to 2013 and was recently appointed to the Johns Hopkins University's Carey Business School as visiting professor on government business and urban issues.

As Governor, O'Malley signed a law that would allow illegal immigrants brought to the United States as "anchor babies" to be eligible for in-state college tuition at the expense of actual American citizens whether they like it or not. Many liberals who voted for him were likely unaware of where the money would come from because liberals don't think deeply into the issues.

O'Malley plays guitar and has been known to strike up a hearty "Kumbayah" at local Irish pubs where he had to be escorted out.

Since the riots in Baltimore, O'Malley has been experiencing night terrors.

Jim Webb b. February 9, 1946 (age 69) attended many schools throughout the U.S. and England. He graduated high school in Bellevue, Nebraska, went to the University of Southern California on a Naval Reserve Officer's Training Corps (pronounced "core," Mr. Obama) scholarship from 1963 to 1964. He was appointed to the US Naval Academy in Annapolis, MD and was on the Brigade Honor Committee.

This alone should immediately disqualify him as a Democratic candidate, but he also served as a Marine in Vietnam where he earned a Navy Cross, Silver Star, Bronze Star and two Purple Hearts. I don`t imagine too many liberals lining up to vote for a war hero.

Webb has as much chance of winning the Democratic presidential nomination as Bill Clinton has of regaining his virginity.

Bernie Sanders b. long ago and far away in the town known as Brooklyn, New Yawk. Actually, Sanders was born on September 8, 1941, three months before the attack on Pearl Harbor.

Bernie went to Brooklyn College for a year and later graduated from the University of Chicago in 1964. As a student, he was a member of the Young People`s Socialist League and was an active Civil Rights protest organizer (aka community organizer) for the Congress of Racial Equality and the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee.

He describes himself as a democratic socialist and would like to see the United States become more like Denmark or perhaps Venezuela. 

He caucuses with the Democratic  party which, while being socialist in many ways, knows that it`s best to continue with the title of Democratic party.

One point of interest is that Sanders lost his first election at Madison High School, coming in last of three for student body president. Socialism was a bit less popular back then. Perhaps he wanted to take 90% of the class lunch money for school improvement projects.

Fun Fact 1: Sanders had his Bar Mitzvah in 1954, one year after the death of Josef Stalin.

Fun Fact 2: Contrary to rumor, Sanders did not do the voice of George Steinbrenner on Seinfeld. It was Larry David.

Fun Fact 3: If elected, it is possible that Bernie Sanders would be the first United States President to die of old age while in office.
Even her smile is a lie

Hillary Clinton b. October 26, 1947 (age almost 68). Ms. Clinton was born in Chicago, Illinois apparently to earthlings.

Clinton graduated from Wellesley College in 1969, got her law degree from Yale in 1973, and moved to Arkansas where she married Bill Clinton in 1975. The marriage is thought by many to be her biggest accomplishment. The couple had coitus which resulted in a female they named Chelsea.

Clinton was the First Lady of Arkansas from 1979 to 1981 and 1983 to 1992. She sat on the board of directors of Wal-Mart from where she evidently got her style of clothing.

As First Lady of the United States, Ms. Clinton's major (failed) initiative was the Clinton health care plan of 1993. The plan failed to reach a Congressional vote as many other things in her life failed (see Watergate and election 2012).

As Secretary of State in the Obama administration, Ms. Clinton was said to be at the forefront to the Arab Spring, but now we know how that worked out. 

Clinton says that she takes responsibility for the security screw up in the 2012 Benghazi Islamic terrorist attack, but actually hasn't accepted any of the consequences for her role in lying to the American public and the families of the four men killed in Benghazi. This failure, of course, occurred because she failed to listen to Ambassador Stevens' request for additional security.

She also apologized, sort of, to the American people for using a private server for her emails as Secretary of State, even after telling her staff that doing the same thing by them is unacceptable.

It takes a village idiot to believe anything she says, but since when has the Democratic party been short of those individuals? Which makes me wonder if Joe Biden will run.



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